by That autumn Sunday morning in October 2010 is still fresh in my mind. I got up at my usual time, around 9 a.m., and went to get the weekend mail while still barely awake. As I approached the mailbox, I noticed my next-door neighbor approaching me to discuss the latest breaking news in the neighborhood: “Good morning, did you hear about the fire?” she asked. “What fire?” I asked.
It turned out that a neighbor’s house three blocks away had burned down with both cars in the garage. Throughout the night, I heard unusual noises such as pedestrians walking and dogs barking, but I dismissed them as some neighbors having too much fun with guests over. The news took me by surprise.
It was hard to believe that this occurred in a newer suburban neighborhood where homeowners are so concerned about fire hazards. Fortunately, no one was injured in this fire, which occurred in the early hours of the morning. However, everything those neighbors owned was destroyed in the fire.
Stop, think, and reflect
This disaster, which was only a few blocks away, caused me to pause and reflect on my life. I imagined myself in their situation and considered what I would do if it happened to me. That thought-provoking question changed my direction: “If my house were on fire and I had a chance to save a few belongings, which would I choose to rescue?”
I didn’t have to look far for the answer. My documents, photos, videos, and CD collection were the first four things that came to mind. Aside from the documents, I realized that the list I compiled was made up of simple items that brought back pleasant memories. These were precious memories from a bygone era.
Did this imply that these were elements of my true happiness? They did, however, capture happy memories and the people I shared them with. While everything else in my house was unimportant and replaceable, these items were irreplaceable to me.
I had an epiphany
A new version of myself emerged after stepping back into my own shoes. I had a lightbulb moment. If the big house with the extra square footage didn’t bring me as much happiness as I thought it did, then why was I working so hard to accumulate things that didn’t truly make me happy? More pressing questions requiring profound answers began to emerge. It signaled the emergence of a new mindset.
In debt, unhappy and with a feeling of being trapped!
I was in debt and unhappy as a result of pursuing the so-called “American Dream.” I was on such a tight budget that I couldn’t even afford to visit my parents in the Dominican Republic as frequently as I would have liked. With a big mortgage and lingering debt, including a small student loan (small in comparison to today’s average balances), I felt trapped.
I was living beyond my means and had no idea until that moment. I’d made a financial mess that needed to be cleaned up while also saving my soul. To the outside world, I appeared to be happy and successful, but to my soul, this was far from the case.
Change was in the air
From then on, I analyzed my entire life and resolved to change whatever I felt needed to be changed! If it didn’t feel right in my heart, it had to go in order for me to be happy. My finances were the first patients in my emergency room. I laid everything on the table, and by focusing solely on what truly made me happy, I was able to pay off all of my debt with the intention of never, ever being in debt again! That exercise resulted in a significant change in my life.
I also started reading self-help books, which aided in my quest for true happiness. My new way of thinking was influenced further by the first series of books, Stop Acting Rich:…And Start Living Like A Real Millionaire, Your Money or Your Life, and How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World.
The fire that destroyed a nearby house saved me from a life of short-term happiness based on debt and consumerism. It truly changed my life, and I hope we can inspire you and others to find true happiness like we did—happiness based on your own values rather than those of the masses.
My wife’s simple way of life also teaches me a lot. She has always lived her life in a way that has made her truly happy. Her life philosophy is that “when you’re happy, it ripples out to everyone around you.” As a result, they are also happy.” I completely agree!
Thanks for this great article and for sharing this familiar story.
You’re welcome! Thanks for taking the time to read and comment.
My fire moment was when a close family member got cancer at a relatively healthy age. It made me realized I may not have have all the time in the world like people say, and to look at my time as an expensive commodity. Thanks for your thoughts!
An unexpected event of that caliber can definitely get you to look at your time here in a different way. Thanks for reading, LM!
I had a similar epiphany about the “American dream” and need just as little as you guys to be happy. It took me a lot longer to realize that material things and living someone else’s definition of a successful life were making me miserable and distracting me from what is important in life. Now we are on the path to financial independence and living life to the fullest. Thanks for inspiring and continue to do so with every post!
That’s great! I’m sure that life tastes very different for you now, as it does for us. Cheers to financial independence and thanks for the encouragement!